Monday, 2 May 2016

Blood Donor (PART 1)

Last week, I shed my blood...sorry..I donated blood for a close relative since her husband was not in town. Now this was scary on a couple of levels. I actually thought it was a very small thing when I agreed. Then it turned out that I didn't think it through very well. It dawned on me that I was in for it that morning, when my dad sent me a couple of texts.
"As you go, God be with you. Don't panic, Eat well and take less fluids. Whatever happens just remember that we love you. Once again may the Lord go with you AMEN". 

Wait o. Its blood I'm going to donate o not my heart! Then I realized that they will have to run a couple of tests including HIV test. Chai. Test that I've been running from since. The only thing that gave me confidence was the fact that the last time I passed any test was in Secondary school. Driving there was the longest ride, In fact  I was driving recklessly. I didn't care again. I was driving like Esther....."If I perish I perish". Something just told me "You better slow down...remember Ibinabo o." I had to give myself brain...I had already spent 5 years in Covenant University, no need to add another 5 years in prison.

We finally got there. One of the nurses approached me and went, "Are you here to drop your blood?" I don't know why she looked like a vampire to me. She directed me to go and pick a number. Now the next phase is the next scary part. I hate pain! I hate needles, pins etc. They had to take our blood samples for testing. Soon it was my turn. The vampire..i mean the nurse was doing her thing while i was gearing for the pain. It looked like he was having a hard time locating my vein. Then she wanted to insert the needle, i had to stop her. 'Ma, are you sure that's my vein because if you chook this tin once I wont allow you chook again o" Because it looked like he was doing ini mini manny mo. So that he doesn't go and pierce the wrong place. Later I will now start looking for my hemoglobin.

Then we went to a room for HIV counselling. I had to ask if its all of us that took the blood test that were in the room for the counselling or they had separated us. I was relieved to know that it was all of us.
"HIV is not the end of the world" I noticed that while the nurse was talking she was just facing me. I didnt want to know if it was coincidence...I started speaking in tongues o. She was now talking about HIV as if its a good thing. Like we have been so mean to HIV but it means well. Is this woman trying to advertise HIV to us.  "HIV is not a death sentence. In fact you can live a normal life and live long with the virus" Eheeen nurse, the virus dey sweet na him you no get am?

She started interviewing us one after the other. Same questions for everybody. Doctors are the only ones that can get the truth out of you because you believe it relates to your health. The questions seemed so personal but all of us had to answer sincerely because we believed they were health related. She asked me:
"Are you married?"
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
"Have you ever had sex before?
I answered her question. 

I really think EFCC should employ doctors to aid their investigations. They will readily tell the truth to doctors. 

"Madam, Have you ever stolen 12 billion Dollars?"
"Yes, doctor hope no problem"

"No..just that it seems you have cancer!"

                                               TO BE CONTINUED

Thanks so much for reading. I hope you enjoyed it. If you want to book SLK for your shows/events, please don't hesitate to contact +234-7035639439. Good night!

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