Stolen Yarns

Saturday, 7 July 2012


These songs happen to be all time favourites of Nigerians but however, when these songs are sung at some particular situations, then they may spell doom for the singer ....or sometimes the singee!
Lets check them out

1)If you are driving and policemen stop you.....Pls do not try to sing or play E MA DA MI DURO! I heard they dont like it! Its rude and they would definitely disobey your orders!

2) If you are walking past a soldier in the Nigerian army or any army for that matter! (KNEELING DOWN) Please, I beg you! Do not sing I CAN BE YOUR SCAPEGOAT! Verily Verily I say unto will not eSCAPE...GOAT!

3) If armed robbers attack you...Please do not sing WON KERE SI NUMBER WA! Because they will show you that Majority does not carry the vote!

4) Please If armed robbers shoot your hand..Pls dont shout OSE! because a yoruba proverb says omo to ba dupe ore ana a ri omiran gba (a child that says thank you for yesterday's blessing will collect another one today) They might bless you again! Advise: If u must be Dbanj..shout MOGBE instead!

5) If you happen to be sitted on a bike in Lagos..please do not sing TORI MO JOKO SINU BENTLEY PORSCHE ATI HUMMER! Remember God hates liars! BTW you will have to prove it when he wants to collect his money!

6) If you meet an Ibo female friend of yours in the mall or in an eatry...Please you don't have to sing YOU MUST CHOP MY MONEY!...she knows already!

7) If you are a nurse and you are checking your patient's temperature.....Thats the wrongest time to sing O GBONA FELI FELI BI AMALA TO JINA!

8) If as a doctor you are checking your patient's heartbeat.....Dont sing YOU DEY MAKE THIS HEART GO PIM PIM! PIMPIMPIM! PIMPIMPIMPIM! PIMPIMPIMPIMPIMPIM! AHAHN Doctor!

9) The mistake you will make is to stand beside a popular yoruba gospel musician, laugh and sing....ENI DURO! I heard he hates that song!

10) Finally, If you are a surgeon, operating on someone's heart, I beg you in the name of God the Father! Please dont sing..HE'S GOT ICEBOX WHERE IS HEART USED TO BE! because he will hear you! And he would become COLD! i.e he would DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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